9 April 2015

Where are the archived podcasts?

Some really observant, not so say obsessive people, may have noticed that podcasts have recently been "retired" from podomatic but have not found their way here... well, that's because now the Eighties Kids have a DEDICATED ARCHIVE!!!

You can find it at http://theeightieskids.blogspot.com


2 April 2015

100th Episode Window Thingie

Here is the window through to the 100th Episode. Obviously it won't do anything particularly exciting until 10am UK time 4th April 2015. But if you want to click it beforehand then any stalking problems you get from creepy dead girls with ironed black hair and no sun tan is completely your own doing...

31 March 2015

80s Kids Survey Request

It's only a few days till the 100th episode and we'd like to ask you a couple of questions. There's only one we'd require you to answer, and that's "Do you listen to us?" because we have no idea how many people listen to the show at all, because we're too cheap to pay for stats, and stats are misleading anyway.

So could we please ask you to take a second to go to the form, tick the box and submit to let us know that you are a listener. There are some other questions that we are asking purely out of idle curiosity.

Your data will not be purloined, sold or otherwise misused we just would like to know a bit about who's listening. As you shall see the data we're gathering isn't really the kind of thing you could use to identify anyone anyway. Thanks!

24 March 2015

Archived Podcasts - January 2015

Episode 87 - Horribly Cheap

The new year is a great time for putting aside old grudges and starting fresh with all things. So naturally the 80s Kids are going to take this opportunity to have a jolly good moan and bring up old grievances. You know, just generally do their uppermost to earn those grumpy old men points.

The focus of Leo and Ian's withering dissatisfaction with week is the anemic generation of so called Horror movies currently thriving down the local cinema. Back in the glory days of the 80s Horror meant disturbing Monsters and gruesome dismemberment prosthetic effects ... or at least something that was shocking and physiologically scaring to watch. These days it's tedious found footage and cheap jump scares.

Frankly we've had enough and we have an hour's worth of moaning about it. It's not just cheap and lazy, the latest wave of horror is the death of innovation. But with Horror being a relativity successful side industry of cinema this humble podcast is as likely to be taken seriously as that guy from the ending of "The Body Snatchers". Incidental Music by incompetech.com

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/087HorriblyCheap/087%20-%20Horribly%20Cheap.mp3

Episode 88 - Films 2003 - Terminating Sean Connery

The passing of Sean Connery out of the world of film making forever is not likely to be the first thing one thinks about when recalling the year 2003, this is partly because League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is quite forgettable and because it was a REALLY busy year film wise.

Return of the King wrapped up the acclaimed Tolkien epic to the sound of many relieved awards and of course Marvel were very much out in force this year, although it's clear now the mass popularity of their present day incarnation was brought with the sweat, tears and failure of earlier films such as Hulk and Daredevil, and according to Leo X2 is looking ropy for it's age now too.

The glut of Films we had to see this is is noticeably up, and other franchise are more than happy to join in the Partly. But if 2003 is remembered for anyone's departure it's likely that old rusty cyborg Mr Schwarzenegger hanging up his mini gun and also making his film making exit with forest mushroom clouds wiping out humanity. Really after that a career in high office politics was a shoe in. Incidental Music by incompetech.com

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/088Films2003/088%20-%20Films%202003.mp3

Episode 89 - The Usual Bad Movies

What do Battlefield Earth, Ninja Terminator, Equilibrium, Highlander II, Catwoman and the Twilight Saga all have in common? Easy, they are unquestionably BAD movies. Not just the bottom pile 'Some had to come last' kind of Bad, I mean awful failures of culture kind of bad.

And yet even in the cesspool of cinema we find different hews and flavors of wretchedness. Sometimes it's just the singular creative vision of one man who's ability is in fact far below his own estimation; sometimes it's because a film is made so fast and for so little money that all choices made were in the lap of whatever they could think to do when the camera turned on; sometimes it's a frustrating mix of actual talent being smothered by fundamentally poor core ideas; sometimes it's because the script just kept changing depending on what day of the week it was; or maybe sometimes it was doomed from the outset because it's based on a book that is in any objective sense awful.

So please come join us as we look over some of the most infamously terrible movies and have nice chat about it all and watch us hope against hope that a bad film can gets so awful it loops right around and becomes hilariously good again. Incidental Music by Incompetech.com

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/Rot80K089/089-Terrible.mp3

Episode 90 - The 80's Kids ABC of Movies - DEF

It's story time once more as the 80s kids return to their Alphabet themed ascent through the films they just want to talk about some more. This week films beginning with D, E or F!

Leo's D is definitely something of a collection of films within his collection of films. Justin's D is quite honestly dreddful and deals with worthy social issues such as effective policing in built up innercity areas. Ian's D is the most horrific and depressing children's film ever made. Seriously Ann Frank is a mad cap comedy musical about hide and seek by comparison.

Leo's E is a riveting exploration of the politics of urban development after the ruling Monarch makes an ass of himself. Justin's E is a traditional English fairy tale ... so murder, rape incest with almost everyone dying at the end is what we should expect! Ian's E is a charming story of friendship that forms between three boys after they decide to follow their dreams and aim for the skies.

Leo's F will have your eyes out on stalks! Well, one of your eyes out on a stalk anyway and not the either ones you expect! Justin's F features an FBI agent who's literally quite besides himself after a police hunt for a dangerous terrorist actually goes very well. And finally Ian's F will feature the post apocalyptic survivors of a polygon world trying to come to terms with the sudden arrival of a pretty CGI dragon! Incidental music by incompetech.com

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/090The80SKidsABCOfMoviesDEF/090%20-%20The%2080_s%20Kids%20ABC%20of%20Movies%20-%20DEF.mp3

25 February 2015

Archived Podcasts - Including the 2014 Christmas Episode!

Episode 83 - 2002: Resident Spider

It's 2002, the year when a lot of the darkness and edge that Hollywood had been striving for in the 90s started to crystallise. The Bourne Identity reinvented espionage, Blade II reinvented vampires and Attack of the Clones brought the burgeoning field of incoherence to new levels of depth and complexity.

The 80s Kids had a great time in 2002 and aren't afraid to let their emotions show on the topic. Good thing for them that they don't live in the world of Equilibrium, both for plot-relevant reasons and because Leo still believes it is the worst film he has ever seen in a cinema to date.

On the subject of the underwhelm aside from the aforementioned clones we also had the Potter film most universally agreed to be "a bit meh" Chamber of Secrets and the forgettable sequel to Men in Black so snoozeworthy it's not even discussed in passing. To protect us from the parade of mediocrity are a number of exciting new developments and spectacular labours of love to go along with Bourne. This is, after all, the year of Raimi's Spider Man and Spielberg's Minority Report.

Can anyone declare the year which brought us Death To Smoochy, Cypher and The Transporter a failure? Can the 80s Kids? Turn on, download and find out. Incidental Music by Incompetech

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/083Films2002/083%20-%20Films%202002.mp3

Episode 84 - The 80s Kids ABC of Movies 1: ABC

It's story time at 80s Kids Towers and Leo is sitting down to concoct a tale inspired by the selections in this new format short run 80s Kids series: The 80s Kids ABC of Movies.

It's all pretty simple really. As we have wound our way through the myriad films of three decades certain films have, inevitably, ended up by the wayside. Some years were so bursting with potential conversation starters that the odd gem got left behind along the way.

The ABC is a way to redress the balance as our three intrepid adventurers select three films per episode whose titles start with a group of hand-picked carefully chosen letters.

In the first in the series the letters are ABC as all letters have been chosen alphabetically. There will be a special no-prize not issued to the listener who can guess what the next three carefully selected letters will be. Shall we? Lets.

Incidental music: "Sneaky Snitch" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/0084ABC01/0084-ABC01.mp3

Episode 85 - A Very 80s Kids Christmas

The 80s Kids are back for another Christmas Adventure! What starts out as a Festive clip show turns into madness and chaos when Justin delivers a message so terrible the others can barely believe it.

What follows next is a perilous journey for survival and freedom through a world crafted by their arch nemesis Michael Bay. Menaced at their every turn Leo and Ian must face Big Bay's unsettling agents with their gratuitous special effects and nonsensical plot logic out to ensnare them.

And no matter who wins one thing is for sure ... The 80s Kids will never be the same again ... Wow ... this is just like EastEnders isn't it? Incidental Music by incompetch.com

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/085AVery80sChristmasShow/085%20-%20A%20Very%2080s%20Christmas%20Show%20.mp3

Episode 86 - Back To Back To The Future

Happy New Year! And what better time is there to talk about Back to the Future than 2015? The mythical far away date which we saw in the second film. Now we're here hover boards are sadly not a reality, neither are hydrated pizzas.

Nevertheless, with the much loved trilogy quickly heading to a time where , ironically, all of Back to the Future will be set in the past it seems an appropriate time to give the series an 80s Kids reevaluation. From the much loved first film, which seems to barely put a foot wrong with it's tight script, memorable characters and brilliant casting, to the eclectic sequel with it's mind bending time twisting plot, to the 'Wraps it all up in a bow' final western themed film that left us all happy and satisfied.

If there is such a thing as a perfect trilogy Back to the Future is a likely candidate. So please come join us as we set our time machines for 1985 and learn again all about believing in yourself, the power of love and the hatred for manure. Incidental Music by incompetech.com

Direct Link: https://archive.org/download/086BackToBackToTheFuture/086%20-%20Back%20to%20Back%20to%20the%20Future.mp3

6 February 2015

Checking Out The Competition On Hangouts

I can see a time coming up at some point in the future where people will live on Google Hangouts On Air. Some people already are. Before the world's first Hangout celebrities are still in the wings looking through the list of available Hangouts can be a surreal, frightening and depressing experience.

The bad news is that trying to find some content to engage with in Hangouts On Air is a big challenge. The good news is that we are all living in a time pregnant with opportunity.

On the theory that forewarned is forearmed I took the opportunity to whizz down a typical list of available Hangouts and show you some broad categories of people who are online now.

Non-English People

It's not a surprise that people who do not participate in the Western culture of mass media and celebrity have quickly begun to grasp the potential of this thing. I think that if we weren't all spoon-fed movies and television in its current formats, neatly packaged and directed, we would be a lot further along with this thing.

If you are non-English you are used to make-dos in media, I suppose. In which case you are not easily going to be put off harnessing an incredibly powerful media tool by the necessity to include a few make-dos along the way.

Religious Types

I am neither endorsing nor deriding this content but it seems that evangelisers and proselitysers of all stripes are alive to the potential of this platform. New media is well known as a hotbed of zealotry and extremism so this kind of programming is to be expected.

Traditional Western media has to be seen to be straight down the middle, even its extremity is watered down until it fits within a broadcasting standard. This kind of niche market sermonising is finding it's home on Hangouts.

Minecrafters/Let's Players

Anywhere there is new media are video gamers streaming their gaming sessions these days. Hangouts and Twitch TV are slowly merging together. This is important because of the last point here:

Youthful Types

See this kid? In two decades time he will own and control all this media stuff that the current generation finds so difficult. A thirty six year old going into business today will be hopelessly outclassed in the market place in two decades. Why? Because these kids are playing around with this tech today and by the time these people step into business they will already feel at ease with this type of broadcasting.

That last point I can testify to. It happened to me. When I was six I got comfortable with a Sinclair ZX81 and now I am a computer master, not mastered by my computer. Staying up to date with technology isn't easy, but it is essential.

The Good News

All this means that if you have thoroughly prepared content, the will to deliver it effectively and the patience to grow your media marketing plan you have the opportunity to dominate with relative ease. One day Hangouts will be rammed to the rafters with content as engaging as what currently spills through our television sets. Everyone will be more competent. Businesses will do this as a matter of course.

That is a daunting world to contemplate. But we don't live in that world, we live in this one. The challenges are different but the potential rewards are much greater than the local broadcasters of the future will dare to dream of.